Goalie vs. Popstar, Lobster vs. Langoustine, Mark vs. the world

Well, this week the intrepid three (Mark, George and I) took on the quizmaster. Our fearless Chairman was absent until the final 6 questions, so this week he’s to blame for the loss. Sorry Dave, but someone’s got to cop it… 

Mark, to his credit, actually performed well this week, with only a couple of “Gilbranch moments”. The first was not a comedy answer as such, but his tense and panicky reaction to the question “What is a freshwater Lobster more commonly known as?” His first reaction was Crayfish, which he scribbled down. Then he paused, crossed it out, and attempted to write Langoustine. It may have been another change of mind, or it may have been the fact he struggled to spell it, but that soon got crossed out too. He starts writing “Cray-” then pauses, and says, “Not sure about this one”. You don’t say. “Well, put it this way, langoustines are seafood”, we tell him. “Right, so it must be crayfish then?” Yes Mark.  

However, Mark couldn’t quite steal the thunder from the real star of the show. Eric, the author, announcer, and arbiter of all things quiz, truly stole the show from Mark, and had us giggling for quite some time. His sheer array of errors, mispronunciations, and incorrect statements really keeps every team on their toes! So, it began on question 2. In his distinctive thick Stoke accent he posed the question, “Which goalkeeper failed to stop Madonna’s hand of God?”. Hang on, did he just say… “I’ll repeat that, which goalkeeper failed to stop Madonna’s hand of God?”  Yup, he did. Apparently one of the greatest footballers of his generation, a diminutive and chubby dark haired dynamo from South America can be easily confused with a tall, skinny, blonde, pop star with ice cream cones on her chest. 

After that, two questions into a 50 question quiz, we had his standard “Ooh, these are easy ones tonight”. You wrote them Eric. If you don’t know the answers, then what chance to we stand? 

“Aside from a very fine eating establishment, what is the Star of India?” soon followed, and then a real cracker. “There are four words in the English language that end in -dous. Tremendous, horrendous and suspenders are three, what’s the third?” Erm, Eric, are you sure about that? Not only have you said three, and asked for the third but you said… “There are four words in the English language that end in -dous. Tremendous, horrendous and suspenders are three, what’s the fourth?” Ok, so he corrected one of his errors. I guess we assume suspenders actually means stupendous… 

So, after Eric stumbled through some more questions, we came to the answers. Sure enough… “It was Peter Shilton who couldn’t keep out Madonna’s hand of God.”  As we chuckled away to ourselves, he let slip another… “The pink and yellow cake wrapped in marzipan is a Battenburger”. At this point someone actually had to tell him he was wrong. “Oh yes, my first mistake of the evening!” No Eric, no it wasn’t. Nor was it his last. 

“The two remaining tenors are Carreras and Domino”. Might need to Google that one Eric. I didn’t tell him that though, for fear he’d try to sing to me. 

Then onto finding the winner, as ever this began with his announcement, “Well, it was ever so easy tonight, so have we got anyone with 45 or more…No? Crikey, I should have played myself tonight! The questions were so easy…” 

As it transpired the winners were the same as last week, and the look Mark gave the bloke as he walked past suggests that Mark has adopted him as his new nemesis. Next week could prove very competitive…

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One Response to Goalie vs. Popstar, Lobster vs. Langoustine, Mark vs. the world

  1. Neil gilbranch says:

    At least this gets the gilbranch name out there a bit more

    Pretty poor turnout for a football team, similar to the training?

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